Simpler Times with Robot Monkeys
The 1980s were a completely different world, and as Xennials- we're a different breed.
I like to think that those of us born in that (according to some) nebulous region straddling Generations X and Y are built differently than others. Due to our possession of characteristics of both masses of individuals, researchers invented the term Xennials to describe us. The lack of a red squiggly underline supports the fact that the term was added to the Oxford English Dictionary in 2021. We played outside until it got dark, which often resulted in various minor injuries such as cuts, scrapes, and bruises that were simply bandaged before we went back out until it got dark. There was no text messaging, so if we were dropped off somewhere and eventually needed to call home for a ride, we fished a quarter out of our pockets and found a pay phone. For my younger readers, I’ll include a picture of a pay phone here.
The 1980s brought a surge in technology, as many devices saw major upgrades- many of those same gadgets now condensed into the smartphones that fit in our front pockets. With these advances came a growth in detail and reality in non-CGI special effects in many films, some of which were more memorable than others.
As a child during the 1980s, I was left frightened by such movie endings as the RoboCop acid bath, the Raiders of the Lost Ark face melt, and the Dr. Doom dip death from Who Framed Roger Rabbit. Although it is easy to go back as an adult and see (or research) how these scenes were created, as a young child with little to no knowledge of the film industry, these were the fuel for sleeping with lights on, as with little to know warning, any of these villains could emerge from a bedroom closet in their scariest mid-death state.
Other 1980s advancements that were less scary but still slightly creepy came in the form of robots, specifically the robot monkeys that entertained me and many classmates over a jubilant early childhood. In the small city of Meriden, Connecticut, there once existed a Burger King restaurant that was decked out in what would be akin to today’s Chuck E. Cheese establishments. No pizza, of course- but rather standard BK fare. Attached to the normal establishment was “Jester’s Courtyard,” which had a ball pit, giant slide, Skee-Ball, and numerous arcade games. Behind that was a room with tables for parties and a stage, with a small auxiliary room next to it with a few more games and room for kids to play.
“Wait! You mentioned a stage. Did people perform on that stage?”
Ah yes, the stage. While birthday parties were held at the tables, the curtains would open every so often with music and voiceover that let everyone in the room know that we were about to hear a tune from “The Majestic Minstrels”! This band was made up of three large robot monkeys, each of which played an instrument while prerecorded music played from the speakers. One of them was on a banjo, another played the piano, and what band would be complete without a percussionist? The third and final money was assigned to the drums. The songs would vary, but for birthday parties (the main event for which this room was used), the song would play with a third line which the monkeys sang as “Happy birthday, dear mmmmmm”. The children were of course expected to scream over the generic sound with the name of the child being celebrated.
While as children this was a relatively fun place to be, I look back at the few pictures I’ve been able to find online while wondering how we weren’t a bit creeped out by those things. My younger twin sisters and I would occasionally sit on a small table in our kitchen while pretending to be those monkeys- I remember that I had the stringed instrument, while my other sisters handled keys and drums. After all, while faces were melting away and evil men hellbent on destroying cartoon characters were melting away in a dip of their own creation, maybe kind robot monkeys singing songs weren’t all that bad. Sure, one of the moneys would malfunction every so often, with a head not moving or eyes that wouldn’t open, but at least they didn’t short circuit and melt away.
A time with no cell phones, more primitive yet detailed movie effects, and a fortitude that left us scarred yet more resilient from things that we saw and did leave us Xenials wondering what the state of the world will be once the younger generations reach middle age. With nothing but CGI in movies, and an ability to do almost anything with a small device that almost every teenager possesses, these kids will never know the art of waiting, or of being seriously scared and kept awake due to the extreme talent and painstaking job of special effects creators. They’ll never know the freedom of going outside and simply being told to come back inside when it gets dark. They can even order something from Amazon and have it delivered later that day, never having to know the pain of having to wait six to eight weeks for delivery. That’s one thing we have that these kids will never know. Patience.